I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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