Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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