I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
