That reminds me...we need to get swords
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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