I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
