its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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