Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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