I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
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