Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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