The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
You are the jesus of drinking
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
