he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
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