Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
