Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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