I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
it was like eating out sand paper
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
