just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
These tits shall not be calmed
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
