some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize