thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Two words: blizzard sex
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
