Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Houston, we have a blender
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
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