i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
