I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
