You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize