Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
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