Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
