...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize