If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
