he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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