I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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