I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
