So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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