just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
