260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize