FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize