so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Two words: blizzard sex
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
My feet surprised me
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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