Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
