Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
