I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
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