if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize
