i think i have herpe
just one?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
The Olympian is in my bed
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
