So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
