K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
Come see our sink grown plant.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Randomize
