she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
