Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
17 year olds will be the death of me.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
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