Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
