bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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