you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
