We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Randomize
