he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
