if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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