he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Randomize
