I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
no you cant smoke seaweed
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Success! We fucked roommates!
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