Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Randomize
