Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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